It's Sunday night and I am not only cooking dinner but I am also driving back and forth picking people up, or dropping off. I feel as though every weekend is this busy, and I have to multitask time for relaxation. Of course not many people will understand this but that's ok. I feel as though may be I do place too much time with juggling things, and I need to enjoy more the moment.
One of the things that I hated most this year was how much I needed to fight with others about my time and how I chose to spend it. Many of the arguments that we placed in front of me had good arguments but in the end I held my ground and found ways to add more to the huge pile of things that I needed to do. I hated feeling rushed, or over whelmed. At times I felt as if I had more than three jobs. This is of course the wrong way to explain it to anyone but I am going to write it as if I would say it. The work that was needed to keep others happy was exhausting. I hated also being fooled with. I hated thinking that I was making a difference to try and take my time and talk with someone and it not do anything.
This new year I am going to try and fix things in my life that I have been putting off. I do not want to have grudges with people that used to be close in my life. I want to move forward in a positive direction. I don't want to multitask for everything, i don't know where to start but ill figure that out in time. That is very important to me. Well hope that's tonight dinner doesn't turn to disaster and that my mind doesn't think of more things that I might feel that I need to write down....
Another night, another thought..never ends.
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